I found today's guest poster totally by chance. While commenting on a totally unrelated blog (this one), I saw that "Mrs. Dr. D" was the first commenter. (See people?! This is why it pays to scramble to post "FIRST COMMENT!!111"). Once I started reading her blog, I felt like I was reading a funnier version of my own life. Luckily, she didn't think my stalkitude was too creepy and the rest, as they say, is a lovely mutual exchange of blog comments and tweets.
Not so much.
I do think that being a wife is one of my most salient identities, but you best believe I am also the first person to challenge stereotypical gender roles in a relationship just for the sake of tradition---the "barefoot and in the kitchen" ideal, if you will. I think that if your feet are sore and you love to cook, go for it, just don't let anyone put you into that role without your consent.
For those of you who have been through medical school either as a student or as the partner of one, you know that med students need a grip-ton (West coast speak for "a lot") of support to get through it, and I have been supporting my fanny off for Dr. D because I love the heck out of this guy. I proudly define myself as a wife because I love being his wife.
But the minute you insinuate that that's all I'm good for... dude, I will throw down.
My husband would never ever imply such a thing because he has known me since 5th grade and he understands all of the passions and (sure, I'll brag) talents I possess. When we're out together and someone makes some comment that magically reduces my entire complex being into a one-dimensional label ("Dr. D's wife"), my dear husband---my best friend---can see the fire in my eyes. And yes, I get perturbed, but it also further inspires me to leave my mark on this world.
I don't save lives in the way that Dr. D someday will, but I'd like to think I impact them daily. I work with college students; I supervise them, I discipline and challenge them, I counsel them, and I lead and mentor them. I live among them, and I role model for them. I role model professionalism, personal independence, dependence on friends and loved ones, and an overall joy of living. The best part of my job is hearing students say that I've helped them figure out a little piece of their own life puzzle or that I've inspired them in some way, and thankfully those times have been more numerous than I ever could have hoped for.
I'm not in my end-game career, and I know I won't be doing what I currently do forever. I'm only 25, and I have many other passions yet to be pursued, among them writing, photography, and being a mother. All I know is that there is more to me than my husband's (future) MD and my new married last name, and I'm supported and loved by the man who shares this name with me. Together, we are pretty much unstoppable.
Haters gonna hate. Us lovers, we're gonna love and live boldly.