Monday, August 6, 2012

the BEST thing about residency

This might be a tad premature -- Y is only about 55 days into his residency, after all -- but I'm going to go out on a limb and say I've figured out the very best part of the whole residency thing.





It starts with a little argument about our house that turned into a full blown, silent treatment kind of dispute. I wanted to put shelves up in a certain part of our bathroom to display essentials like the 20 year old bottle of Chanel No 5 I found in my mom's drawer, and the 95 cent bowls I scored at Anthropologie. Things that absolutely need to be on a shelf center stage in our bathroom.

Since my brain turns to mush as soon as it tries to think about tools and drywall anchors and studs, I needed Y to put up these shelves. But when he tried to drill, it was more difficult than he thought due to a piece of metal in the wall. He managed to successfully put up one shelf, but he wasn't willing to do more damage to the wall to put up the second shelf.

I -- because I'm so handy, remember? -- tried to convince him that one tiny hole in the wall wasn't going to affect anything. This is where things got hairy. Apparently, I was "nagging". Psh. 

"Why can't we put them over here?" he asked, pointing across the room.

"That doesn't make any sense!" Why would we have one shelf on this wall, and one halfway across the room? Boys. 

"You literally picked the one spot in the wall where we shouldn't drill. Find a different spot."

Eventually -- it took at least 3 days -- Y realized that I was not going to shut up about the shelf. He successfully hung it, much to his chagrin. So far our house is still standing.

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The second part of this story involves the facts that a) these shelves are above the toilet, and b) Y believes that when he "only pees a little", flushing the toilet is not required.

You see where this is going.

When my moisturizer fell into some fresh urine the other night, there was no question: HE was fishing it out. Not only was it his urine, but he has dug around inside a) dead people and b) rectums. And probably c) dead people's rectums. All gross tasks should default to him.

This is where it gets good, fellow naggers. Listen carefully.

As he gingerly placed the bottle in the sink, I shook my head. "Whose idea was it to put those shelves there, anyway?" It was sarcastic; slightly apologetic. I was ready to take the blame.

He looked at me, anger flashing in his eyes. "Where else would we have put them?" he retorted indignantly, as if I had insulted his greatest work of art. 

You guys. Residency makes them forget. The possibilities are endless.


11 comments:

  1. this just made my day. Seriously.

    My favorite thing about residency?? (not really but you will get where this is going) he works such long hours and when he gets home the last thing he wants to do is mess with getting the house ready so guess who gets to make ALL the decisions on where things go?!

    Oh and the bathroom shelf debate? It's currently happening in our house right now. Although I'm terrified of things falling into toilets so I got shelves with a lip on the edge. Probably won't do anything, but mentally it reassures me.

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    1. a lip... I should have thought of that! So far we've had my moisturizer and a bottle of nail polish as casualties.

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  2. Hahahaha - turn that chronic lack of sleep to your advantage!

    The really great thing about residency I picked up on right away (after Peter ran into sheetrock while hanging shelves in my office; they got put up, but with much cursing): the beauty of dual incomes. When it came time to mount the TV above the fireplace, I hired people!

    p.s. still amazed by your 95 cent bowl finds. But even the ones I payed full price for were worth the $2.50... they're so darn cute, they just make me happy. Perfect for your shelves.

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    1. Geeeez Anne... it sounded really impressive that they were 95 cents until you told everyone there were just 2.50 to start!

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  3. Forgetfulness, I don't want to ruin your fun but it can backfire! Please consider joining us for a bloghop this week! Read more about it at http://fromadoctorswife.blogspot.com/2012/08/medical-mondays-blog-hop-is-here_6html We are linking up blogs from medical students, residents, attendings, nurses, doctors, etc. Find new friends, meet old ones - we are here all week:-)

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  4. omg. when we first moved into the new apartment kanishk and i argued about where everything went. he actually thought a) his ideas were great b) i would let him make any decisions on placement. it was cute. the only thing he got to choose was where his desk went...3days later the screws came loose from the wall and it came crashing down...i loved it.

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    1. who argues with an interior decorator about decorating?!? CMON KANISHK.

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  5. Totally laughed so hard I teared up at this! As a fellow nagging wife, I appreciate this story more than you can imagine.

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  6. Yes! :) B and I are still arguing about where to put the couch. I keep telling him his ideas are asymmetrical and can not happen. This story is hilarious.

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    1. That is Y's EXACT problem. Why don't boys understand symmetry??

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  7. Hi! Thanks for following my blog- I just started following you as well. Your posts are hilarious! My husband is a PGY5 Ortho in New Orleans. I saw from one of your other posts that you're from LA. Where did you end up for residency and for what specialty? My husband also used to be super forgetful when he first started residency- I guess from lack of sleep. Unfortunately for me that has somewhat subsided :)

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