Is it just me, or have articles with titles like this taken over the internet recently? It's gotten to the point where I don't talk to anyone anymore for fear that I will offend them -- but let's be honest, I probably wasn't going to talk to them anyway because my eyes are glued to my phone where I'm simultaneously refreshing my Instagram and reading an article called 12 THNGS YOU SHOULDN'T SAY TO PEOPLE WITH BROWN HAIR.
I do think I tend to see more posts calling out people for daring to say things to pregnant people or mothers (Exhibits a, b, c, d) and I always wondered if those same things would offend me when I was pregnant. Sure enough, I've developed my own list:
5 things you should never (ever!) say to a pregnant woman (or anyone, really):
1. Look at you! Pregnant, you resemble a walrus!
2. I'm going to murder your family tonight!
3. Congratulations! I bet your kid grows up to be Hitler.
4. YOU'RE pregnant? And it's HIS baby? Did you guys consider... you know... going to the schmashmortion clinic?
5. BRB, honey, going to join ISIS!
Basically my advice to you this weekend is LIGHTEN UP, WORLD. There are some pretty terrible things people could say to you, and then... there's the stuff you would be a whole lot happier if you didn't get so worked up about.