Holland 1: The Hague

When I was three, my family moved to The Hague, which is the capital of The Netherlands. We lived there for three years, and for about 12 glorious years after we moved back to the States, I had some really great material for the "fun fact" every person should carry around in their back pocket: I lived in Holland and have been to almost every country in Western Europe. 

Eventually I got lapped. My friends started doing foreign exchange programs. Month long backpacking trips across Europe. Biking tours of South America. Teaching English in China. Basically, I had to get a new fact. Good thing I'm left handed and Jewish.

The first leg of our Holland trip was spent in The Hague. We explored the city by bike and visited my former house, which is on the same street as my preschool and across the street from gorgeous dunes that border the beach and the North Sea. 

{1: the beach, 2: the dunes, 3: my street}

I remember a lot of things about my neighborhood: leaving empty wooden shoes out on Christmas Eve for Sinter Klaas to fill with presents (apparently he doesn't discriminate), getting stung by a bee in our back alley, the fact that you turned right to get from my house to preschool. But I cannot for the life of me remember there being a beach. I don't particularly love the beach now... apparently it's never impressed me. 


Some other pictures from the Hague:

weekend (and vacation) lessons v.3

01. When you're enjoying a picnic in the middle of the Dutch countryside and a teenager rides her bike up to you and says, "I have just one question for you. You have secret for me?" here's a hint. She is not, as I initially assumed, just a Dutch youth partaking in a midday scavenger hunt and asking if you have a clue for her. She's actually asking you if you have a CEEG-a-rette. It's a mistake anyone could have made. 


02. We got rid of our cable a few months ago, and it's only on trips to the gym that I get to experience the important lessons channels like E! and Bravo can teach us. Lessons like, How dare I bemoan my life when poor, sweet Kendall Jenner is left in a bind because both Drake and Lil Wayne are on tour and unable to perform at her sweet 16??


03. When we got the Sunday New York Times, I saved 6 months worth of issues to use for packing breakables. Next time, I won't save the 9/11 anniversary issue. I just had a really depressing afternoon of wrapping plates. 


04. Y has officially been watching too many TV dramas (Mad Men, Game of Thrones, Fringe) to enjoy a comedy. We're catching up on New Girl, and in one episode Jess has an older boyfriend who is playing a drinking game that involves standing on a chair. Y, in his serious plot prediction voice, said "Ah. He's going to fall and die." Because that's the kind of thing that happens in Fox comedies. 


05. The morning you forget to brush your teeth will OBVIOUSLY be the morning that four dentists surprise you with a going away brunch. 

Now go read Joy's weekend lessons. Prepare to be insanely jealous of where she lives! If you made a list, leave me a link in the comments so I can see!


If you follow me on twitter and/or instagram (werejustdandy), you may have noticed that Y and I just got back from Holland! We had a great time (I'm ready to turn around and go back) and I'll share more about our trip soon.

culottes for mom

I remember my mom loved culottes. She bought them for me, for herself, and she probably would have bought them for my dad if he would have let her. 


I think she would be happy to know that culottes are back, and that I own two pairs. 


I can't promise that I'll jump on board when her next favorite 90s trend, puff painted t-shirts, come back in style. 

stairs

Recently, I started a wellness campaign at work to encourage employees to take the stairs. It's been great, but I've learned a few lessons along the way and thought you should know them... just in case you ever decide to embark on a similar adventure.


1. You will talk about stairs. A lot.


Since the beginning of my campaign, I've become a sounding board for people who want to talk about stairs. Which is apparently a lot of people. The most common topic of stair-related conversation? 6 degrees of stair climbing, eg: "Remember my friend Ellen? Her husband's co-worker climbed down 3 flights of stairs recently!" Spoiler alert: It's not as fun as 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon.


2. You will accumulate garbage.


Somewhere along the line, I started feeling ownership of the stairs. If I saw litter in the stairwell, you better believe I was picking it up and sticking it in my purse. And that is how, three weeks later, I became the crazy empty Milky Way wrapper lady.


3. You will succumb to peer pressure.


Once people started to realize that I was behind the stairs thing, it was not safe for me on the elevator anymore. I got plenty of evil eyes, and I was just waiting for someone to ask me how I could promote the stairs when I was clearly an elevator-rider myself. I hate making small talk in the elevator to begin with, much less small talk that involves me defending myself. So, I started taking the stairs. Every. single. time. I walked down 6 flights of stairs at least twice a day. It cannot be a coincidence that around this time I woke up at 2 am screaming bloody murder with my first ever charlie horse. Take it from me, people. The stairs are dangerous.



4. People really like the title "Step it Up" or, simply, "Take the Stairs".


The name of my campaign was Stairs 2012 -- like a presidential campaign. The name was everywhere; on every sign, sticker, banner, flyer. Yet people still came up to me and said things like, "Great job with Step it Up!" or "I saw Take the Stairs on the news last night!" 



5. You will become afraid of the stairs. 


I became convinced that I was going to die in the stairwell. I have this theory that if something will make a really great headline, it will happen. For instance, if I was on any mode of transportation and both Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves happened to be aboard it as well, that boat/plane/train would sink/crash/derail. The headline would just be too amazing for it not to happen. Anyway, Stair Advocate Murdered in Stairwell is just begging to be published.

hi dee ho, neighborette

Just a little housekeeping announcement:


Here in Y's hometown, in a medical community he grew up in, we are comfortable enough to assume that nothing I say on this little blog will get him in trouble. In Minnesota however, we don't know anyone. And not that I think I'm particularly controversial, but you know how curmudgeonly those doctor types can be.  I don't want anything I say to make anyone mad. (Curmudgeonly is obviously a compliment.)


So effective immediately, Y will be taking on a Wilson-like persona on this blog, meaning he will appear occasionally to offer wisdom, but never show his face. JTT will also be moving in next door.


They'll never figure us out. 

weekend lessons 2

01. All you need is love, a tandem bicycle, and a wedding ceremony full of people singing "all you need is love".


02. There is absolutely no point of spending any time on your hair when you're in South Louisiana. None.


03. Five wedding cakes are better than one.


04. The Carols might be camping this year, our greatest adventure to date.


05. The super moon is best seen out a moonroof while listening to nineties rap. 




My new friend Joy and I both happened to write "weekend lessons" posts last week. We're pretty sure it should be A Thing. Did you learn anything good this weekend?

I'll miss you, neighborhood

Every time Ike and I take a walk, three little kids on my street stop climbing trees/riding bikes/riding scooters to come say hi. I'll let you soak that in for a second. Kids... are playing outside. I didn't realize they did that these days.


Anyway, the kids' excitement over seeing Ike never wavers. They scream his name, tell him to sit, ask him for kisses, and then say, "Well, we should probably let Ike finish his walk." or  "It's always good to see Ike!"


With no sarcasm whatsoever, I can say I'll miss those kids. 


Our neighborhood is interesting. If you head in one direction, you're 2 blocks away from some of the nicest houses in the city. Another direction and you're a block away from a snooty tennis court. But in the other direction? Let's just say you don't want to go there.


A few other things I will, rather sarcastically, miss:

• 7 pm phone calls to a friend/neighbor  to ask if she thought that noise was a gunshot or a car backfiring.
• Finding the 3 B's of sketchiness on the sidewalk while walking: bullet casings, brass knuckles, and boobs. Yes, I once found porn on the sidewalk. What, you never have? Where do you live, Pleasantville? Agrestic?
• Neighbors stopping by to let us know that a man with a chainsaw was spotted on our street at night.
• Domestic screaming matches at 4 am. Bonus: if they end with a man leaving the house at 6 am, shirtless and double fisting Bud Light.
• My car getting broken into. Although it did force me to clean it out, so... thank you, person wearing Y's TJ Maxx coat and wondering why that GPS you stole won't work (HINT: you forgot the charger).
• Getting stopped on a leisurely Sunday walk around the neighborhood by a driver asking us if we've found Jesus. I guess we looked lost.
• Domestic screaming matches at 4 am at a different house. This dispute was apparently solved, because the next day I saw the couple shaving themselves together on their front porch. Which is a sure sign of reconciliation.