fashion, or lack thereof

On occasion I work with a colleague named L. The first time I met L he told me my outfit was very "Anne Hathaway".  I knew we'd get along.

L lightens the mood around our office when he's in town, rearranging office furniture and picture frames,  reminding everyone of important facts like Madonna's daughter's name (Lourdes, duh), making me mix cds featuring "Rock DJ" and "Suddenly I See".

He recently made an appearance at my office door, saw me, and nodded approvingly. "CUTE!" he declared. I held my breath. I was wearing an outfit I had been itching to recreate after seeing it on Matchbook's Tumblr, and was anxious to find out if it would receive the coveted "Anne Hathaway" designation.

L took in the ensemble, a look of approval still on his face. "Is that a skirt or an apron?" he asked.


I squinted my eyes at him from across my office. We were surrounded by computers and filing cabinets, not an oven or sink in sight. "An apron?"


He shrugged. "It kind of looks like an apron. It's not one?"


"You thought I got out of bed and decided to wear an apron to work today?"


"Bu-"


"You complimented my outfit even though you thought it might be an apron?"

He was confused by my confusion. I let it go.


Moral of the story: if worse comes to worst and you need to wear an apron to work, I will look at you funny and ask you about your apron in such a way that it needs to be italicized. 

weekly gratuitous ike: really really ridiculously good looking

There's something you need to know about Ike.


Every night when we get into bed, Ike sits patiently on the floor to our left. He's figured out that as soon as we unfold the comforter -- the barrier Ike sleeps on so we can keep his hair from getting all over us -- he's allowed to get onto the bed.  


When the comforter unfolds, his ears perk up. He knows that's his cue.

And this is where it gets tragic. 


He doesn't get on the bed right away. Because Ike is not an ambi-jumper. 


It's a problem he's had since he was a baby. He can't jump onto the bed from the left side.


So when he gets the signal to get on the bed, he has to run to the right side of the bed to jump up. He leaps up victoriously, turns around in a circle a few times, and settles in for the night at our feet.

I know what you're thinking - it's surprising that a seemingly perfect animal has such a remarkable flaw. We're clearly heartbroken over here.  Won't you make a donation to the Center for Puppies Who Can't Jump Good?

P.S. If you really get me (you can read minds?) you knew this was coming:

blink

I took this picture in July. Summer threatened to last forever -- stopping to snap this picture probably left me sweating and exhausted -- and the flash of purple and yellow, our team's colors,  made me long for everything that comes with LSU football: crisp air, dragging our down comforter out from storage, scarves.

I took this picture yesterday. Our football team is 10-0, the regular season is almost over, and Thanksgiving is close enough to touch. That top picture and the longing for the suffocating summer to end feel like yesterday. 

And that's a little scary.

{the soundtrack to this post: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJBhdKrwTOc}

filling in some blanks

1.   A nervous habit I have is     twirling my hair. Really, could I have picked a ditzier habit? Also, not that this is exactly a habit, but sweating. So if I'm ever really sweaty and acting particularly airheaded, you know why.

2.   Something that makes me sad is   the circus.

3.  Today I am thankful for    glittery fuzzy slippers, peanut butter, a particularly goofy husband, leaves that change colors, and the word particularly.

4. My favorite room in my house is    the bedroom - it manages to stay clean when the rest of the house isn't, has the best light, and stays the coolest.

5.  I can't stand  the music that plays on the closing credits of tv shows. It's usually a [in my opinion] creepy version of the theme song. I distinctly remember, as a kid, covering my ears and making a lot of noise so I wouldn't have to hear the closing credits to Sesame Street. I have the same sentiment toward music that plays over and over again on DVDs. I have no clue where on earth this hatred came from. 

6.  If I had an extra $100 to spend on whatever I wanted today I would   pay to have a professional pet hair remover come to our house. It's 30 degrees outside, Ike. WHY are you still shedding?

7.  The last person I hung out with was    my friend Laura. She rented the Kiera Knightley version of Pride and Prejudice so we would be prepared for our next book club in case time ran out. I tried SO hard to cheat on Pride and Prejudice the book with Pride and Prejudice the movie, but I felt guilty 30 minutes into the movie and had to stop. I much prefer being wooed by fictional characters through reading than through watching. If that makes me a nerd, so be it.

flattered

The girl arrives at work in her frumpiest outfit, rushed and sweaty after yoga class, no makeup. Who’s going to see her anyway, she thinks.

Later, exhausted and self-conscious, she buys  a cup of tea at the cafe. She stands in line behind a handsome doctor. He glances behind him and says, “...and I’ll pay for whatever she’s having.”

The girl thinks she must look (and smell) even worse than she thought; the doctor must have felt sorry for her. "Thanks," she says, embarrassed. She walks off quickly, head down and back slumped, undoing whatever benefits the yoga class had on her posture.

As she stirs skim milk into her hot tea, she is struck with a thought: Maybe, just maybe, he wanted to buy me a drink.

And then, she catches a glimpse of her reflection in a window and gets angry.

Who does this asshole think he is? Just because he has a white coat and a chiseled jaw, he thinks he can make some frumpy girl's day? No way. I will not allow myself to be flattered by this. I don't need some handsome doctor to make me feel special.

A few hours later, she tells the boy, her own handsome [almost] doctor, the story.

He listens then nods, understanding.

"You do kind of look like crap."

{because it's more fun to tell your "love story" in the third person}

fall decorations for under 5 dollars

I'm not a big seasonal decorator, but this year three unexpected things happened that added up to some easy fall decorating.




1. GIANT ACORNS!

You guys. The acorns this year are on steroids. At least, the ones falling off one tree on my street and one tree on my dad's street. I tried to pick some up without looking like a total weirdo -- which is a lot harder than it sounds. I think I managed to grab a few handfuls without being noticed and stuck them into some empty Starbucks Frapuccino bottles. Insta-fall!


2. I followed through with a thought I had last year.

That would be saving all of the thank-you cards I received. Can you think of a more appropriate Thanksgiving decoration that you already have on hand? (Note: cornucopias don't count. Don't lie, you do NOT have a cornucopia on hand.)



I'm proud of this one for two reasons. A) Spending more than five seconds on an idea is not something that comes naturally to me, much less waiting a year to implement it. B) I think I came up with this all by myself - not from a blog, not from Martha, not from Pinterest. My own head. That rarely happens anymore, right?


P.S. Do you love our pomegranate dish as much as I do? It was a wedding gift, and the pomegranates are from our neighbor's tree.






3. Y bought me flowers.

Y is not the type to buy things like flowers. But one day he unexpectedly came home with the perfect fall-hued flowers that promptly replaced my dying basil plant on the windowsill. (The French Lavender, however, is still going strong.)

weekly gratuitous ike: reflection

On Halloween, I dressed Ike in his costume before we went on our walk. His costume was... a dog in a hat. 

This was the hat - photo taken New Year's Eve.

Then I giggled for the duration of the walk. I'm sure we were quite the sight, a girl in hysterics and a dog in a fancy hat.

Once I was done giggling, I started to feel bad for poor Ike. I believe that those 10 minutes spent wearing a hat in public traumatized him and forced him to re-evaluate his life. 

So I made a video about it. 

Click here to watch it on Facebook, or here to watch on Youtube - I hope it makes you smile.